Can we just be real, please?

Probably one of the greatest consequences of the Fall, besides of course the entrance of sin and death into the world, is the human tendency to wear a mask.  If you remember, one of the first things Adam and Eve did after they ate the forbidden fruit was to try to cover themselves up-- to try to hide their shame, sin, and newly discovered nakedness.

This trend has followed us since that unfortunate day.  It has even followed us into the church.  We put on our Sunday face, clothes, and vocabulary, and go to gather together with other believers and play "pretend".  We are all doing just fine.  No family issues.  No financial messes. No addictions.  No rebellious children.  No hurt.  No pain.  And then we go home exhausted from "faking it" all day.

My heart hurts that we can't be authentic in church.  Or at least we won't.  Everyone knows that the first step to conquering any life problem is admitting that it's there.  So, why aren't we real??  We may be fooling everyone else, but deep down we long to be able to show who we really are and still be accepted and loved.  I know I do.

In the book of I John, we read that "If we claim that we experience a shared life with him (Jesus) and continue to stumble around in the dark, we're obviously lying through our teeth--we're not LIVING what we claim.  But if we walk in the light, God himself being the light, we also experience a shared life with one another, as the sacrificed blood of Jesus, God's Son, purges all our sin."

How many "Christians" walk into church pretending to be all cleaned up inside, but with so much darkness on the inside.  They are drowning in their own hurt, pain, and addictions, but who would know?  I would rather know who someone really is with all their junk, then only get to know the superficial Suzie and the happy-all-the-time Harry.

One of the greatest benefits of walking in the light, or walking in the truth, is to be able "share fellowship" with one another.  Or get to "share life" together.  I long for REAL community with REAL people with REAL issues.  We all have them.  Let's stop pretending that there are "those people" who have issues and then there's the rest of us who have it all together.  Come on, nobody really believes that.

So, be real.. be authentic.. and learn to be a safe person that people can be real with...  Let's love and not judge, let's live our lives openly before God and each other...  That's the only way authentic relationship can exist in this fallen world...

Blessings!

Future Faith

Anxiety is one of the strongest emotions a human body can feel.  It is also one of the most debilitating.  It can paralyze you.  Keep you from moving forward in your life, and rob you of peace, sleep, and joy.

Having been diagnosed with panic disorder almost 10 years ago, I know how anxiety can ravage the body, soul, and spirit.  When I'm dealing with anxiety, I can't eat..literally.  My gag reflex goes into high gear and my body rejects food.  My soul feels hopeless and disconnected.  My spirit fights to keep the faith.

So, what do we do with anxiety?  How can we recover from it's debilitating grip?  This may sound cliche, but we have to keep our eyes on Jesus.  And more specifically, vizualize Jesus with us in the present and in the future.

We can get so caught up worrying about what the future entails with regards to finances, relationships, job situations, health issues that we think we somehow have to bear our future on our own.

When was the last time that you thought about your future and imagined Jesus in the future with you?  Sarah Young says, "Anxiety is the result of envisioning your future without me (Jesus)".   Boy, am I guilty of that sometimes.  I make plans and lists, develop strategies and action steps, but it is all an attempt to control my future so I know I will be successful and strong.  It's not very often that I vizualize Jesus in the future.

In one of Jesus' famous sermons, He says, "Do not worry about your life, what you WILL eat; or about your body, what you WILL wear."  The word "will" has never popped out to me like it did a few days ago.  Don't worry about future needs.  Instead, develop a deep, relationship with Father who knows what you need and is already in the future now working things for your good.

Anxious?  When looking at today or tomorrow, picture Jesus with you there.

Blessings!

A Forced Rest

"He makes me lie down in green pastures..."

Probably one of the most well-known passages in all of the Bible, Psalm 23 is often used as to speak peace to someone who is in turmoil or to being comfort to someone in fear or pain.

My daughter has memorized Psalm 23.  I have heard it at several funerals.  I have said it at night as I am trying to sleep and my brain won't shut off.

This week, I am in the green pastures lying down.  Because I'm on vacation?  No..  Because I have been forced to rest.

I am in the last month of pregnancy and having some complications and my doctor has said, "REST!"  Do not overdo it.  Rest for your health and the health of the baby.  Rest.

I have a tendency to overdo it.  I am a doer.  A mover.  A shaker.  An overachiever.  A "yes" person.

And I pay for it sometimes.  I get overwhelmed.  Exhausted.  Burned Out.  I feel pressure to perform.  I feel guilty for saying no.  I tend to always feel in a hurry, even when I don't need to be rushed at all.  I have codependent tendencies.

There have been specific times in my life that the Lord has had to "make me lie down in green pastures".  Faced with a bout of clinical depression at one point, my counselor said to me that he would just write me a prescription for a very long vacation if he could.  I needed to rest.  I needed to take better care of myself.

So with this forced rest I am on now, I have had to say no to many people.  To several opportunities.  I have had to be still for many hours at a time.  I have had to let people help me. (Ouch!)  I have had to have Jesus remind me that more important than being a "doer" is "being with Jesus".

I am hoping that I am learning the lesson of resting and further along in that journey than before.  After all, it is much better to develop a habit of rest, a sabbath, than to have to submit to a forced rest.

So, do yourself a favor... REST!

Blessings!

The Safety Net of Life

One of my favorite passages of Scripture is found in Ecclesiates 4:9 -12.  It is a longer passage, but I think you will benefit from me writing it here:

"Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.  If one person fals, the other can reach out for help.  But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.  Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm.  But how can one be warm alone?  A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer.  Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken."

If you've ever had to face life completely alone, you know how impossible it seems.  My heart goes out to single moms, widows, and orphans.  People who are alone.

But then again, all of us need each other.  We need a support system, a safety net, a shoulder to cry on.

I think loneliness is one of the most painful feelings a person can have.  The feeling of having nobody on your side.  No one who cares.  No one who calls.  No one who checks in on you.

In the middle of life's trials, there is nothing that can hurt us more than to allow the enemy to isolate us form the people around us, even if we are not feeling like being around anybody.  You have to reach out.  God never intended you or me to go through life alone.  There is life, joy, love, and hope in community.  And each one of us needs it.

I want to encourage you to look at your life and identify your support system.  Who are the people that are your community?  Your family, friends, pastors, doctors, neighbors, and others can all have a role in your support network.  You need to be able to be honest with these people.  To not pretend everything's okay when it's not.  Choose to be more dependent and not feel like you have to so much on your own.

The world ingrains independence into our brains from an early age.  And sure, I am not talking about needing a crutch.  What I am talking about is loving one another.  Laying down our lives for each other. Bearing each other's burdens.

Don't walk life's road alone.

Blessings!

The Power of Empathy

Have you been at a breaking point in your life, a crisis, a tragedy, a low time, and you just wished you could talk to someone who could relate?

There are people who SAY they understand and then there are people who REALLY understand.  

Empathy is a powerful gift.  If we're honest, most of us wish we couldn't relate to people's tragedies because that means we have had to face some tough trials in our own lives.  But the amazing thing about trials is that God uses our trials to comfort others.  

I remember (vividly) when I started having panic attacks and faced severe depression after my first baby was born.  I was so afraid that I was going to live the rest of my life in that state.  I looked at other "normal" people and was so hurt that I would never feel normal again.  I would never be happy again.  I would never enjoy life again.

A pastor on staff with us who was in the middle of a fight with bone cancer took me aside one day, and told me how depression had consumed him for months.  I couldn't believe it.  He seemed pretty normal to me.  He was able to laugh.  To enjoy life. To smile.  He told me that I was in a season that would pass.  That gave me such hope to know he had been there and come out the other side.

Sure, there were many others who offered words of encouragement and prayers, and all of those gestures were very meaningful, but there is something very powerful about empathy and testimony.

There were also others who judged me because I was a depressed, anxious Christian.  How is that possible?  I must not have had enough faith for myself.  I needed to just snap out of it.  They had all the "answers" but no compassion or empathy.  Honestly, these "Christian" people made me question the love of Christ.  Was I unacceptable to Him because I was struggling?  Absolutely not!

The people God put in my path who showed empathy, compassion, and unconditional love were truly life savers for me.

I hope you will allow God to redeem your pain by allowing you to comfort someone else who is struggling with life.  And I hope when you face hurts and hurdles in life that you will find an empathetic friend who will help you to come out the other side as an overcomer.

Blessings!