In the last month, I have had to "re-live" my past on a consistent basis, or at least it has felt that way.
With every crisis phone call, and every person seeking hope, I have an opportunity to share how God has brought hope into my hopelessness, and restored me when I was at my lowest point. Sounds great, right? It is! God has been faithful to me and never abandoned me in my pain. However, there was still pain... and pain is painful.
As I relay my hope-filled story, I am reminded of a pain-filled past. Painful memories flood my mind and tears begin to stream down my cheeks as I remember the betrayal and hurt that reside in the calendar days of a few years ago. I don't want to feel those feelings but they are a part of my story.
So, I have options... Do I not tell my story so I don't have to remember the pain of the past? Or do I put walls around my heart as I tell the story and live in denial that the past hurt so deeply so that telling my story is easier? Or, do I tell my story, pain and all, so that it can help one more person know that there is hope even in the greatest pain...
For me, the answer is clear. I will not let the pain of my past keep my story under lock and key, unavailable to be read by someone who may desperately need to know that in all the pain, there is hope.
There is always hope.
With my story, comes pain. But... with my story, comes hope.
Blessings!
