Hurt vs. Harm

One of my favorite Proverbs says, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend."

At first glance, this proverb may seem contradictory.  Wounds can never be a good thing, right?  They hurt.  They burn.  They sting.  Friends aren't supposed to wound us.  They are supposed to support us. Love us.  Stand beside us.  Encourage us.  Make us laugh and feel better about ourselves.

Sure, these are great qualifications for a true friend.  Honestly, though, we need friends who will also be real with us when we are making bad choices.  Who will stand in the way of us walking down a harmful path.  Who will keep us accountable to the values and goals we have for our lives.  Does it hurt when a friend "wounds" us by doing these things?  You bet.  We may get defensive, give them the silent treatment, or post some vague comment on facebook about how we wish we had real friends.

But the truth is a friend who will "hurt" you so you won't "harm" yourself is a true friend.

We often think hurt and harm are synonyms.  Not really.  There are things in life that will hurt us, but they won't harm us.  It hurts my kids when I have to put them in a time-out from their computer games because they are mistreating each other.  Does that hurt them?  Yes, and I usually hear about it in high-pitched squeals.  But does it harm them?  No, it teaches them to value people.

Let's go a little deeper.  There are times God will allow pain into our lives that hurts, but it doesn't harm us.  In fact, it causes us to depend on Him even more.  To cling to Him even more.  And that is right where we should be.  The most painful times in my life have been the most intimate with Father (God) and Jesus.  Those times were very hurtful, but as I look at my life now, I see that those times not only didn't harm me but they have shaped me into the person I am today... more graceful, more merciful, more empathetic, more real.

I am thankful for friends who are willing to get in my face sometimes and not LET ME walk down a path that leads to harm.  Do you have that kind of friend in your life?  Or do you get offended and push those friends away?  Remember, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend."

Blessings!